On Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, Tumblr, Twitter... everyone is perfect. Every picture is of people laughing with friends and having drinks, or of beautiful food that's perfectly angled with just the right lighting.
There are no pictures of those 2am tears. No pictures of pimples or pus, or throw up on your clothes in the back seat of your friends car. Those were my clothes, I was so embarrassed.
If you never met a single person face to face and all you had to judge people by were their social media profiles, you'd think everyone lived a perfectly happy life.
You'd think that they had no problems, no struggles.
But the truth is, every day is a struggle. Every day there are battles.
And a lot of those days you are going to lose.
You won't go to the gym, you'll smoke that cigarette after saying you've quit. You'll feel guilty, ashamed and disgusting.
You'll spend whole days in bed when you should be doing homework, work projects, cleaning, or something. You should be doing something, anything, but there is so much piling up that it paralyzes you and you do nothing.
Some days you lose, and you feel useless.
Everyone has those days. Everyone has those internal battles.
What separates the people who crumble under the pressure from those that become stronger?
The Morning After.
What happens the next morning?
You either lament, or you try again.
You either step back up on the battlefield or raise the white flag before the day even starts.
Everyone loses. It's the people who waste no time, no energy even thinking about putting up that white flag that will prevail.
It's the people who go into their day knowing that there could be blood and pain and they will lose more often than not, but they know this and they commit to fighting that battle every single day.
Every day they will fight for their dreams, for their happiness, and sometimes, for the willpower just to get out of bed.
Any energy spent regretting and reliving the past instead of focusing on your present is wasted energy.
So what if you binge ate yesterday, so what if you didn't have the courage to speak to that guy or girl again? So what if you spent the whole day feeling useless and questioning the futility of your existence in a cruel universe that barely knows you exist?
That was yesterday, and this is today.
The people who become stronger under the pressure are the people who can let go of yesterday and stop it from contaminating today.
The more energy you spend regretting the past, the less energy you have to break the cycle and make today different.
It doesn't matter how many hours, days, or years you've spent living below your potential. It doesn't matter how long you've felt useless, walking around in a daze.
No matter how many embarrassing stories and mistakes you've made over time, you could wake up the morning after and believe that today will be different.
Putting your focus and energy on re-imagining and rethinking the past just traps you there.
Every morning wake up and tell yourself that yesterday is gone, and today will be different.
With love, Steven Farquharson